Tuesday 25 July 2017


Please read part one before reading this post. 

Warning, adult content, over 15s only.

Some people don't regret at all. They usually have a brain disorder.

My Way. This song was famously chosen by President Donald Trump for his Inaugural ball. Since the first verse points out that the "end has come" and the person is dying, I thought it was a curious choice for a "beginning ball" . Then I saw the cake that imitated his predecessor's cake, but only one tier was real and the rest was allegedly styrofoam. They seemed to have no regrets about that, so the choice of song started to make more sense. 

Some people regret engaging in crimes. 


I'm including it because I don't want to leave out one part of the world's culture, and it's relevant. I don't like the word. 

Excerpt from "Regrets" by Jay Z.

"I sold it all from crack to o-pium, in third person

I don't wanna see em, so I'm rehearsing
with my peoples high to GM, from a remote lo-cation
in the BM, scoping the whole situation like, "Dayamm!"
Metamorphic, as the dope turns to cre-am
but one of these buyers got eyes like a Korean
It's difficult to read em, the windows to his soul
are half closed, I put the key in
Pulled off slow, hoping my people flee-in
Ch--k tried to knock the only link that tied me in
Coppers was watching us through nighttime binoculars
This time they got us on tape, exchanging dope for dollars
Make me wanna, holler back at the crib in the sauna
Praying my people bailed out like Time/Warner
Awaiting call, from his kin not the coroner
Phone in my hand, nervous confined to a corner
Beads of sweat second thoughts on my mind
How can I ease the stress and learn to live with these regrets
This time, stress, giving this sh--  up, f---

This is the number one rule for your set
In order to survive, gotta learn to live with regrets
On the, rise to the top, many drop, don't forget
In order to survive, gotta learn to live with regrets
This is the number one rule for your set
In order to survive, gotta learn to live with regrets
And through our travels we get separated, never forget
In order to survive, gotta learn to live with Regrets."

Written by F.Di Pasquele  & Jay Z

I think this applies to a lot of careers, not just violent ones, if we're honest with ourselves.

King David in the Bible was a really cool dude. Popular with the warriors, best friend loved him like Trump on a horse with a bare chested Putin; in favour with God, killed a huge but not very bright bloke called Goliath using just a lucky pet stone and a slingshot, could lull a cantankerous king to sleep with his harp, his lyrics were winning him the top 10 on the Jewish Hits charts. The people made him King, possibly because Grammy awards weren't yet invented, and the throne needed less dusting if somebody sat on it.

However, he was human. We can hold up leaders , religious ministers and famous people to a higher standard than ourselves, and perhaps we should, but at the end of the day they are human, they sin. CELEBRITIES ARE NOT GODS (Beyoncé , if you're listening.) 

David stuffed up royally. He deliberately got his neighbour killed, to get his wife. He did it remotely, (as JayZ says) sending the man away to the front lines where the battle was hottest. 

"in third person

I don't wanna see em, so I'm rehearsing
with my peoples high to GM, from a remote lo-cation
in the BM, scoping the whole situation like, "Dayamm!""

From "Regrets" sung by Jay Z.

We too distance ourselves from wrongdoing, but sponsor it as consumers, ripping off third world workers, or battery hens, remotely, never getting our hands soiled. Like Jay Z, we regret that, but push it down, "learn to live with regrets".

David had wives and concubines already, but the neighbour, a lowly soldier, had only one. David saw her bathing one day when he was leaning on his balcony wishing for a wild bucking horse event, saying "Rodeo, rodeo wherefore art thou rodeo..." .He saw her in the buff and wanted her, because , duh, lust, but also because power corrupts a soul. Power is isolating, so reality can get mislaid in all the swathes of entitlement. After the deed, the prophet Nathan brought God's message to David. 

Man you've been bad, and God is mad.

 Fair enough. David started having regrets. ( People get advised by their lawyers to show remorse at their trial in the hope of a lighter sentence).

King David was the whole package, you know: big brown puppy eyes with long lashes, charm, latest embroidered tunic, Nike ventilated performance sandals, (Nike was the god of very fast running on sweet feet), toned caramel legs with just the right amount of hair on them, champion, slingshot, pet lucky rock, muso, poet too.

 I fell for a poet once when I shouldn't have. I regret it now as I was already taken. But poetry, if it's not bad, is a heady brew. David thought he'd try it out on God to get himself out of this mess he'd made . It couldn't hurt, right?

14 "Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
The God of my salvation,
And my tongue shall sing aloud of Your righteousness.
15 O Lord, open my lips,
And my mouth shall show forth Your praise.

16 For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it;
You do not delight in burnt offering.
17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,
A broken and a contrite heart—
These, O God, You will not despise."

King David
The Bible.

And more stuff harping on in that way. I think it's a good prayer for the police and military who struggle with having killed humans. So many get PTSD from killing, not just from someone trying to kill them. It's confronting taking a life, even if it's in the line of duty, you were following orders, or you were not responsible because of lack of sleep, given that your spouse was on a Netflix binge the night before on the bedroom tv. 

"Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God". 

Deliver me from the guilt. I could use that one with my regrets, too. And this bit "A broken and a contrite heart—These, O God, You will not despise."

He lived in ancient times. He was a rich celebrity. He could make laws, break them, afford organic locusts and wild vegan honey even out of season, but in contrition he was just like us, broken hearted with regret. Mostly because he got caught, but let's not get picky.

God needs us to be empty before he can fill us up with grace. If we are still full of our own bulldust, we will eventually go down like Goliath.

The lead singer of Linkin Park , Chester Bennington, died at age 41 this week of suspected suicide. If you feel life is getting too much, please get professional help, go to a doctor or call a helpline in your country. If you are in Australia, try Lifeline or Beyond Blue. 

Their music is very powerful. Here is one of their earlier songs. I think this song is art because it delves immortal themes, and different people see different things in it. It became an anthem of part of a generation. I put it last today because it's more hopeful than the other songs, I see redemption in it as well as regret.

First some interpretations by fans.

I think this song is about saying goodbye to the old you. The part of you you can't forgive because of the lies and horrible things you've done to hurt yourself and others. It's about having hope, forgiving that part of you and wanting to change for the better. It's an awesome song.
Xtr1kon April 05, 2007   

"A call to humankind to forgive itself and destroy the cycles of destruction in which it has snared itself. This song is both hopeful and desperate, but its message is clear: humankind cannot forgive itself until the individual--you and me--forgives himself for the wrongs he has done. 

Man is something that must be overcome."
TheBigMattowskion April 11, 2007   

Excerpt from "What I've done", sung by Linkin Park.

"In this farewell
There's no blood, there's no alibi
'Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth of a thousand lies
So let mercy come and wash away
What I've done

I'll face myself to cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

Put to rest what you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands of uncertainty
So let mercy come and wash away
What I've done."



Flyx Hoods-

"R.I.P Chester Bennington "

You Tube commenter.


Profound Familiarity said...

It seems possible to make a distinction between emotions like guilt and sorrow, which involve feeling bad about something that happened in the past and regret, which can imply a wish that the past could have somehow gone differently.

The difference might seem negligible and unimportant but for those with a certain type of deterministic or pantheistic view of life, the question over whether things could ever be different from how they are (without darkness, would there be any light?) appears to render regret a bit pointless.

This does not mean that such individuals are emotionless. Far from it. A person may still find theirself saddened by the thought of a tragic event that occurred in the past, simply due to their natural empathy.

Profound Familiarity said...

A decent blog post Cath. Very appropriate Linkin Park video too!

Running on empty said...

He was supposed to have been sexually abused as a kid, leading to depression and drug and alcohol addiction. So sad. Has six kids, so sad for them to lose their Dad.

Rina said...

Dan, I think the point of regret is much as Running suggests in the post. It can instil the wish never to do the evil, or make that mistake, again. A small example -- I remember, under great stress, once completely losing my rag and turning a full blast of adult rage on a little boy. Oh, his terrified face! Yes, I regretted it, and I never did it again. And I have just thought back to a hugely regrettable action I will not detail. I've often wondered, would I do things again as I did in the past and concluded that I probably would. But you know, this time I thought deeper. In the same situation, but with perhaps the extra wisdom that regret brings .... I probably would not.

A thought-provoking post, Running. And that video is stunning. Forces one to focus. Nice if the great and powerful were made to watch it once a day.

Running on empty said...

Scientists know where the regret centre is in your brain, it's in the very front, above your eyes. The area as a whole makes us think about the results of our decisions, both before and after we implement them.

Fizzfan said...

Wow, absolutely loved the Linkin Park song. Yes a stark look at the grim realities of some of the things we've done. Just have to hope there's always enough time for regret to put it right again.
Mind you, I read a quote by Stephen Hawking the other day.....
"I believe alien life is quite common in the Universe, although intelligent life is less so. Some say it is yet to appear on Planet Earth".

Yeah, I've seen the old red mist at times in my life and been vile. I've also been arrogant, dismissive, aloof and distant. I've got to know my faults but equally recognise everyone else has their own set too. Different people and situations bring out different traits in you.

I can't remember a time in my life when I've actively set out to hurt anyone so don't dwell on feelings of regret too much. I suppose I have regretted having known some people in my life for a while, but still end up valueing the experience at some point on some level.

If you regret and learn from it, thats a positive. If you get stuck raking over old embers, it only cools them off and leaves you with a bigger mess to clear up anyway.

KEthical Politics said...

The Linkin Park song was great...I agree. As individuals I doubt anyone will get through life without regrets, either we did too little or we did too much, or we made the wrong choice...we think. The thing is we will never really know if that is true, so it's best to move on and don't look back, just try to learn and move on. No sense beating ourselves up and ruining what we can do in the future. Collectively as a member of the human race, I have a lot of regrets that we have been so callous to our fellow humans and our planet. There is no excuse people should be starving when we have excess food
I also agree with The Steven Hawking quote that Fizz stated

The older I get the more I realize common sense isn't very common.